new to Panama?

if you want to find out who’s bloody and lying dead in the street throw down 35 cents and pick up a copy of la critica when you first hit town.

but before you do, remember Nietzsche’s warning, “one does well to put on gloves … the proximity of so much uncleanliness almost forces one to do so.”

now ol’ Nietzsche was talking about the new testament, but his words could apply to la critica. it’s ok, even wicked fun, to read these guys. in fact, it might even be a good way to learn spanish. just don’t forget to wash your hands afterwards. read more»

“prohibido chupar hasta la medianoche de hoy.”

i stare back at the front page of today’s Mi Diario. “hasta la medianoche?” bastards. how’s the average gringo expected to make it ’til midnight?

i’m just lucky it takes me that long to sober up. i ask a native why i can’t drink today. she tells me it’s “the way we show respect for the dead.”

i don’t know, going cold turkey seems extreme. next year they’ll want us to give up sex. how ’bout we just pray, weep, and gnash our teeth like all the other good Christians? read more»